


Living in Erebor

by missauburnleaf



Series: Sequels [1]
Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Bigotry & Prejudice, Drama & Romance, F/M, Family Feels, Family Fluff, Family Secrets, Female Friendship, Fluff and Angst, Fíli and Kíli Brotherly Love, Fíli and Kíli are Dwalin's children, Meet the Family, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Rape/Non-con, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Scheming, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-23
Updated: 2017-09-12
Packaged: 2018-09-19 08:22:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 18,005
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9429863
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/missauburnleaf/pseuds/missauburnleaf
Summary: "Life in Erebor wasn't easy..."Tauriel has to cope with her fate after she and Kíli had suffered at the hands of Bolg...This work is inspired by butterflyslinky's story "Unwanted". To be more precisely, it is a sequel to her story.





	1. Pondering

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Unwanted](https://archiveofourown.org/works/3798508) by [butterflyslinky](https://archiveofourown.org/users/butterflyslinky/pseuds/butterflyslinky). 



> I hope you all enjoy... And if you haven't read butterflyslinky's story, please do so! It's worth your while.

Life in Erebor wasn't easy.

Tauriel could hear the whispers, could feel the stares whenever she walked down the corridors, whenever she took her meals with the others in the King's Hall.

She was a warrior and she was used to wearing practical clothes, tight-fitting leather pants, her leather armour, tunics, jerkins, overcoats. Not several layers of puffy dresses and confining corsets which were supposed to enhance her non-existing curves. Every dwarrodam wore them when she was not traveling. But Tauriel wasn't a dwarrowdam. She was an elf!

Yet nobody seemed to be interested in that fact. She was the wife of a Prince of Erebor and was supposed to act according to her role.

Every night she cried herself to sleep.

This was not how she had expected her life with Kíli to be. She had been so stupid while dreaming about their future before that incident.

Kíli had talked about firemoons and escorting caravans and she had pictured them to explore the wilds of Middle Earth together, hunting their food with bow and arrow, sleeping beneath the stars. Those had been a little girl's naive dreams. She knew that now. On that fateful day on Ravenhill, she had learned the difference between dreams and reality.

In all the stories she had heard, she had read, love was supposed to be sweet and the passion shared between two lovers, between wife and husband, was supposed to be an all-consuming bliss.

Yet that wasn't what she had experienced at her 'wedding'. All she could associate with the act was pain, desperation, desolation, shame.

Tauriel knew that it wasn't Kíli's fault and she didn't blame him. She knew that if he hadn't done it, one of the orcs would have taken his place. And if that had been the case, she would have been dead by now, faded away like so many others of her people who had experienced violation.

But she was still alive and she could feel a new life growing inside of her, an innocent life that hadn't asked for being created and yet it was.

Tauriel remembered the Orcs taunting her, taunting Kíli, forcing him to spill inside of her to create some 'mutant'... And now she was carrying a child. Kíli's child.

She hadn't told anyone about her condition yet.

"Princess Tauriel?"

She stopped dead in her tracks when she heard his voice. Regaining her composure, she turned around, facing him.

"Yes, Ori?"

The gentle, softly-spoken dwarf cleared his throat.

"You didn't come to your lessons today and I was a little bit worried... Is everything alright?" he asked.

Oh yes, her lessons in Khuzdul, in dwarfish history. Thorin trained her like he had trained his nephews. Because it was possible that she would become queen one day... If anything happened to Fíli, that is. If anything happened to Fíli before - or if - he would take a wife, produce an heir...

It reminded her too much of Thranduil's efforts when she had still been in his favour, when he had wanted her to learn all the things that Legolas as the heir to the throne had to learn because back then the elven king had considered her as his foster daughter...

"I'm sorry, I wasn't feeling well. I beg your forgiveness for not informing you," she said.

Ori looked devastated.

"Oh no, you don't have to apologize to me, my Princess. It is I who should apologize for addressing you like this when you are clearly suffering from bearing the heir to Erebor."

Tauriel clenched her hands into fists until she could feel her nails pressing into the palms of her hands.

"Excuse me?" she said, drawing her eyebrows together.

Ori cleared his throat again.

"Well, you are carrying Kíli's child. It's obvious. People have wondered why there was this rush considering your engagement to the prince and especially the marriage... But now it all makes sense," Ori explained.

In an instant, Tauriel was at his side, grabbing his lapels and pressing him into the next wall.

"What do you know, dwarf?" she asked. "What do you know about the conception of this child?"

Ori seemed to be afraid of her, of what she would do... Good.

"N-nothing, my Princess, I don't know anything at all... Maybe I have come to the wrong conclusions," Ori stuttered and only then Tauriel noticed what she was doing, releasing the young dwarf.

"Go, Ori. Please, just go and leave me alone for today," she finally said and with a bow, Ori did just that, leaving Tauriel, the Princess of Erebor, alone with her grief, with her sorrow.

 


	2. Kíli's Persistence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kíli brings Tauriel lunch and they talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unbetaed.

When Tauriel woke up, she didn't know where she was, when she was. The only thing that she knew was that the persistent pounding at her door was annoying.

Then she remembered. She was in Erebor and it was already Nínui. She had been living in Erebor for about three months by now.

"Tauriel? It's well past lunchtime and you didn't come down to the King's Hall to eat with us. Is everything alright?"

It was Kíli.

Rolling onto her side so that her back was facing the door, she pulled the blankets over her head, intending to ignore her husband.

"Tauriel? Please open the door and let me in. Everybody is worried about you. _I'm_ worried about you," he explained.

Tauriel sighed. Why couldn't he just leave her alone?

Slowly she got up from her soft and ridiculously large four-poster-bed (knowing full well that it was meant for two people, a conjugal bed) and crossed the room to the connecting door between her and Kíli's room.

"What do you want, Kíli?" she asked after unlocking and opening the door, looking down at him.

He smiled shyly at her.

"I thought you might be hungry and brought something for you... Actually, I thought we could have lunch together in our rooms and talk?" he suggested.

Tauriel felt dizzy and nauseous.

"I'm not hungry, Kíli," she said and was about to close the door again, when he put his foot on the threshold, preventing her from doing so.

"Please, let's have lunch together and talk. We haven't really talked since... the incident. Pretty please with sugar on top!" he pleaded with her, giving her the puppy eyes.

Despite herself, Tauriel smiled.

"Oh, Kíli, I appreciate that you brought lunch, I really do, but I'm not feeling well and would rather lie down and take a nap," she explained.

Kíli frowned.

"You've been doing this a lot recently... Is really everything okay? Ori said that you even missed your lessons today because you were unwell..." he mentioned.

Tauriel nodded.

"Yes, I'm just a bit exhausted. The last few months have been overwhelming for me. I think once I'm settled I will be fine," she answered.

Kíli studied her for a moment.

"And you are sure you don't want to eat anything? You know, I actually skipped lunch with the others once I noticed you weren't there and I hate eating alone... So, would you at least keep me company while I'm having lunch? I even brought a bottle of Dorwinion wine for you..." he told her.

Tauriel bit her lip.

Kíli had been nothing but sweet to her ever since that incident, concerned with her well-being, making sure she had everything she needed, defending her whenever someone made a snide remark. And she had been keeping him at arm's length the whole time.

"I'd like to keep you company, but I won't be drinking any wine," she made clear.

Kíli raised an eyebrow.

"Why not?" he wanted to know.

Tauriel hesitated. She could always claim it was due to her being unwell, but she knew she should tell him the truth. He deserved the truth. It was his child as well, after all.

"Because... I'm with child," she whispered.

Kíli's jaw dropped.

"What? Are you sure?" he asked.

"Yes, I'm sure. I can already feel her fae - her spirit," she answered.

Kíli stared at her unbelievingly.

"Her?" he inquired.

"Yes, her," she said.

"A girl, then?" he pressed.

"Yes, a girl," Tauriel confirmed.

Kíli beamed at her.

"A girl. We are having a girl. I'm going to be a father. Oh Tauriel, that's wonderful, I'm so, so happy! Actually, I think I'm the happiest dwarf in Erebor, no, in all of Middle Earth right now!" he exclaimed, tentatively reaching for her hand, pressing a light kiss to it.

Tauriel gave him a sad smile. His enthusiasm warmed her heart, yet she couldn't share it.

Being a mother (or getting married) had never been her top priority. Of course, after beginning to understand her feelings for Kíli, she had thought that maybe one day they would settle down, have children together. But not so soon and not under such circumstances!

Kíli seemed to notice her reticence.

"Tauriel, what's wrong? Aren't you happy?" he asked tentatively.

That was too much for her.

Burying her face in her hands, she started crying.

"No, I'm not happy because everything is wrong! It was never supposed to happen like this. A child should be something wished for, it should be created with love and be loved since the moment of its creation. It shouldn't be the result of such a violent act!" she sobbed.

"Tauriel, please, don't cry, I'm so sorry for everything that happened on Ravenhill but I'm not sorry that something good came out of it! Believe me, this child was created with love! Don't you remember the bond between us? That we are married in body and soul because I already loved you back then?" he tried to console her, placing his hands on her upper arms, gently stroking her.

"B-but what happened between us, that... that wasn't love," she argued.

Kíli sighed.

"No, that wasn't love, but what we felt was love," he reasoned. "And I already love our child! I wish you would have told me sooner, but now that I know I can't feel anything else for her but love," he confessed.

Tauriel stopped crying, wiped away her tears and then she leaned down towards him, pressing a light and gentle kiss to his lips.

It was the first kiss between them since their wedding ceremony in Erebor.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nínui: Sindarin for the month of February  
> Tolkien set in 'The History of the Hobbit' Durin's Day on 19 October. So I assumed that Tauriel must have come to Erebor at the beginning of November.


	3. Approach

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tauriel and Kíli have lunch together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!

At the beginning, lunch with Kíli was a pleasant affair. They were able to talk like they used to before the incident on Ravenhill, pretending that this had never really happened, that it had only been a bad dream. Almost.

Tauriel helped herself to some sweet rolls filled with quince jelly and a cup of water while Kíli entertained her with stories from council meetings and the restoring of the forges and mines, telling her that everybody was working very hard so that everything would be ready when the first caravan with settlers from Ered Luin would arrive.

"My mother sent my uncle a message while already being on the road, saying that she is sure they will arrive in about a month. Originally she had intended to supervise the departure until the very end, but when she got the news that I was getting married, she decided to leave with the first caravan, eager to get to know her daughter-in-law. She will be beside herself when she finds out that you are with child!" he explained.

Tauriel felt nervous about meeting Kíli's mother. What would the dwarrowdam think of her? She didn't know why her son got engaged to an elf just one day after the battle and married to her only one week later. Tauriel couldn't stand the thought of her mother-in-law regarding her as some kind of vixen who had seduced her baby boy. At least that was how some of the dwarrowdams from the Iron Hills who were currently residing in Erebor referred to her behind her back. On those occasions, Tauriel cursed her good hearing.

"Tauriel? Are you alright?" Kíli suddenly asked, looking worried.

She forced herself to smile. "Yes, I'm alright. I'm just nervous about meeting your mother - what if she doesn't like me?" Tauriel remarked honestly.

Kíli looked confused. "Why wouldn't she? Everybody likes you!" he exclaimed.

Tauriel almost snorted.

Was he really so naive and innocent? Nobody really liked her here. Most of the dwarrows and dwarrowdams treated her with due respect since she was a princess now, married to their king's nephew, but she had no real friends. And some of the dwarrows and dwarrowdams didn't even try to hide their disregard.

Tauriel had never felt so lonely before in her life, not even amongst her own kind when Thranduil had taken her in and raised her like a daughter, always favouring her, which had caused some discontent among his subjects. Being captain of the guard and Legolas' confidant hadn't really helped her being popular, yet it had earned her their respect. Because she was good at what she was doing: being a warrior, leading the other guards, defending their homeland.

But here she didn't have anything to do except from learning about dwarven culture and acting as the prince's wife which meant she didn't only have to study with Ori and Balin, but also with some of the noble dwarrowdams, like Dain's wife Freya, to learn some of the tasks that were mainly performed by females. They all despised her, making up things she had allegedly said and done, things that were considered to be offensive or wrong or which were showing her unwillingness to blend in with the dwarven culture.

More than once she had been summoned to Thorin because one of the dwarrowdams had uttered their complaints about her, complaints which might not have been flat out lies (and how was she supposed to know what she should do, how she should do things correctly if the others didn't really show and tell her), but which were misrepresented facts.

Of course it was never the dwarrowdams' fault, always hers. And how should she defend herself when she didn't even know what exactly she was accused of? So, more than once she had left Thorin with the promise to try harder, yet all of her attempts had apparently not been enough in the eyes of the others.

"Nobody likes me, Kíli," she finally whispered, lowering her head.

"Why do you say that? Has anyone been mean to you?" he asked sharply.

Tauriel laughed humourlessly. "The question is: Who hasn't? The dwarrowdams don't accept me, make me feel like an outsider, always running to your uncle and telling him what I have done wrong, how difficult I'm to deal with," she confessed.

Initially, she hadn't wanted to tell Kíli about this, but she needed someone to confide in. Before the incident on Ravenhill, she had considered him a friend. Yes, he was her husband now, but she didn't need a husband, she needed a friend. Maybe they could repair this friendship despite everything that had happened between them.

And so she told him everything that had transpired between her and the dwarrowdams, how they made her feel like an outsider, like a scapegoat. While listening to her account, he balled his hands into fists, drawing his eyebrows together.

"I'm going to talk to Uncle" he interrupted her at some point, jumping up from his chair so that it fell clattering to the ground.

"No, please don't, Kíli! You'll make everything worse! And I can fight my own battles," she exclaimed desperately, also rising from her chair, trying to hold him back.

Kíli shook his head. "No, apparently you can't. At least not this one. You are a warrior, you are used to fighting in combats. You don't know anything about wire-pulling, and that is exactly what these dwarrowdams are doing. I'll go straight to Uncle. He should have known better than to believe in what they were saying about you!" he explained angrily, breaking away from her hold on his arm, storming out of the room.

Tauriel tried to follow him, but the heel of her boot got caught in the hem of her green velvet dress and she nearly tripped. At the last moment she was able to prevent her fall, cursing those impractical clothes she was forced to wear. She knew that a fall could have harmed her baby, could have caused a miscarriage and so she decided to rather stay in her and Kíli's rooms, hoping that he wouldn't say or do anything stupid in his anger.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading:)


	4. Anger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kíli runs to his uncle in order to inform him about Tauriel's mistreatment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoy the new chapter!

Kíli was furious.

How could anyone dare to treat Tauriel, his brave and beautiful Tauriel, like that? How could his uncle condone such a behaviour?

Without paying much attention to anything and anyone around him, he stormed down the corridors, intent on reaching his uncle's council room where he was supposed to have a meeting with the newly crowned King Bard of Dale, discussing a trade agreement or something like that.

"Prince Kíli, you cannot simply walk in there without permission!" the guard in front of the door to the council room called after him, but Kíli ignored him, opening the door, rushing into the room.

"Kíli! You can't storm in like that!" his uncle exclaimed, but Kíli ignored him.

"How can you let this happen, Uncle? How can you let those accursed dwarrowdams torture my wife?" he asked bluntly.

"What is the meaning of this?" Thorin asked in his most authoritarian voice, trying to mask his surprise.

"You know well enough what this is about, Uncle. You summoned Tauriel because the dwarrowdams, who were supposed to support my wife concerning her role in Erebor, are treating her like a doormat, always claiming that she did something wrong but never trying to help her!" he exclaimed.

Before Thorin could reply anything, Bard intervened. "Thorin, is this the way the females of your people treat women of other races, especially the wives of your nephews? Maybe I should keep that in mind before giving my consent to this union."

Kíli barely noticed the devastated looks of Sigrid and Fíli, mainly focussing on his uncle.

Thorin's expression immediately darkened. "I had no idea. Tauriel never said a word against those dams, barely defending herself and her actions," he explained.

"Of course she wouldn't rat the dams out, that's not her style. But you should have known better, Uncle!" Kíli scolded him.

Thorin sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Maybe I should have. I admit that I didn't really go into the matter, with everything else that needed to be taken care of. I'll talk to the dams and make sure that it won't happen again. Tauriel doesn't have to attend those lessons with the dams until I have spoken with them, alright Kíli?" he proposed.

Kíli studied his uncle for a moment before slowly nodding. It seemed that Thorin honestly regretted to have played into the dwarrowdams' hands.

"Alright, Uncle," he said.

"Fine, Kíli, I would like to finish my negotiations with King Bard, if you don't mind... Why don't you go back to your wife and tell her about the cancelling of her lessons?" Thorin suggested, obviously trying to get rid of his younger nephew. That only peaked Kíli's interest.

"Oh, what are you negotiating?" he wanted to know, completely forgoing any protocol while noticing how his brother was looking desperately into their uncle's direction.

Thorin cleared his throat and exchanged a quick glance with Bard, who just shrugged.

"Well, if King Bard and I can agree on a bride token, you brother will be betrothed to Sigrid, the Princess of Dale," Thorin revealed.

Kíli's jaw dropped. His brother was about to get betrothed? How could he have missed Fíli finding his One? Why didn't he tell Kíli that he was courting?

"F-Fíli... betrothed?" was all he could utter, staring completely dumbfounded from his uncle to his brother, then to Sigrid and finally Bard.

"Aye, if Bard and I can agree on a bride token, as I said before, Kíli. Therefore I would appreciate if you can leave us to it," Thorin answered slowly and clearly as if talking to a small child. Or an imbecile.

Pouting, because his intelligence had been insulted, he asked, "Why can't I stay? I swear, I'll just sit here and be as quiet as a mouse," he said.

Fíli sighed, "Uncle, let him stay. He won't give up anyway."

Thorin turned his attention towards Bard. "If the King of Dale and his daughter don't mind?" he inquired tentatively.

Bard exchanged a glance with Sigrid, who blushed slightly but nodded her okay.

Grinning smugly, Kíli sat down at the council table, joining the others. He remembered well enough when Thorin and the elven king had agreed on a bride token for Tauriel. To everyone's surprise, Thranduil had only demanded to be given a few jewels he fancied and Thorin had been fine with it.

It seemed that Bard was harder to please. He demanded more than Thorin was obviously willing to give, trying to argue why.

"She is my firstborn, the spitting image of her late mother and my voice of reason. I believe you can imagine how dearly she will be missed. It was her who raised my youngest, after all. Tilda will be inconsolable to be without her sister," the King of Dale argued and Kíli had to admit that the man had a point there.

"If your daughter marries my heir, she will be Queen one day. Yet she is still very young and no dwarrowdam, which means she will need training and has to attend lessons in our history and customs," Thorin countered.

"And yet Sigrid has other qualities. She will be a good wife to your nephew and make a wonderful mother one day," Bard stated.

"If they will be able to have children together, that is," Thorin said, "maybe they are... not compatible in that way."

It went back and forth like that for a while and Kíli almost regretted his insisting on being allowed to stay because he got bored, letting his mind wander, thinking of his beautiful and pregnant wife. When he was about to fall asleep, his uncle and Bard seemed to have reached an agreement, since they were shaking hands while Fíli and Sigrid were beaming at each other.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Somehow - I don't know why - I imagine Sigrid's mother to have looked like Candice Night from Blackmore's Night. What do you think?  
> Your feedback is very much appreciated!


	5. Revelation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kíli finds out something about Sigrid's past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter in which dark secrets are revealed.

After his agreement with the King of Dale, Thorin sent for Balin and Ori in order to draw up the contracts of betrothal and marriage.

Of course, there would be two different contracts. Kíli remembered this all too well from his own betrothal and marriage, which had been, given the unusual circumstances, rather small affairs.

Instead of a real betrothal feast which would normally be attended by family and friends and at which the contract would then be signed by both parties (the bride-to-be and bridegroom-to-be as well as their parents or legal guardians), it had only been a small gathering with him and Tauriel (obviously), Fíli, Thorin, Thranduil and Legolas (representing family and friends) as well as Balin and Gandalf (who acted as witnesses). They had shared meat and mead afterwards as was customary, but there hadn't been any singing and dancing.

Their wedding had been a little bit more festive since it had been attended by the dwarves from Thorin's company, Bilbo and Gandalf, the elven king, his son and two or three other elves as well as Bard and his children (and now Kíli remembered that his brother and Bard's eldest daughter had seemed to get along _very well_ during the feast). But it was nothing in comparison to the splendour which was typical for dwarven weddings in general and royal weddings in particular.

Apparently, Fíli and his bride-to-be would have such a splendid feast in order to celebrate their betrothal and later their wedding.

A part of Kíli felt bad for Tauriel because she hadn't been honoured in the same manner as Sigrid would be, yet the circumstances of their wedding had been entirely different.

When Balin arrived, followed by a flustered looking Ori, Bard and Thorin started negotiating again, working out the details of the contract.

Kíli only listened with half an ear. Talking politics and attending council meetings weren't his most favourite activities, but he had asked Thorin to stay despite his uncle's reservations and he wouldn't show his defeat by leaving now. To be honest, he hadn't even really listened when Thorin and Thranduil had worked out the details of Tauriel's and his betrothal and marriage contracts since he knew that Fíli was there and would make sure that everything would be done correctly and to his content.

But then something that Fíli said caught his interest.

"No, there won't be a bedding ceremony before our wedding night or a presentation of the bedsheet afterwards!"

Kíli could see that his uncle and Bard were as surprised as he was.

The bedding ceremony was the highlight of every dwarven wedding, giving everyone the opportunity to sing lewd songs and make raunchy comments while getting the happy couple ready for the big event (though it wasn't unusual for dwarves to indulge in intimate acts after their official betrothal and before their actual wedding).

Of course, there hadn't been a bedding ceremony at his and Tauriel's wedding feast for obvious reasons.

Yet the fact that his big brother wanted to forgo this tradition as well was weird. Did Fíli simply do that to make Sigrid feel more comfortable since it was a dwarven custom? At least that was what Thorin had told the company when announcing that there wouldn't be a bedding ceremony at Kíli's and Tauriel's wedding. He had claimed that it would offend elvish marriage customs.

But then his brother and Sigrid would also forgo the human custom of presenting the bloodstained bedsheet after their wedding night, a custom which should not only prove that the marriage had been consummated, but also that the bride had been untouched before the wedding.

Although Kíli wasn't that familiar with human customs, he knew that to them the bride's virginity before the wedding was very important. So why would Fíli and Sigrid forgo this important tradition which would attest Sigrid's chastity?

It seemed that Bard and Thorin wanted to know the same.

"Isn't it enough when I say that Sigrid and I have agreed on not including those old-fashioned and degrading customs in our wedding feast?" Fíli said, looking at his uncle and Sigrid's father with an unreadable expression.

Bard and Thorin exchanged another look, then Thorin cleared his throat.

"No, it isn't. You two are royalty and it is expected of you to follow traditions, especially since this wedding will join the Lonely Mountain and the City of Dale. You two should value the customs of our two races to show everyone your good will to make this union work," he explained, glancing at Sigrid and Fíli.

Kíli noticed how his brother gave Sigrid sidelong looks while the girl lowered her gaze, blushing furiously. Something was definitely going on to which neither Kíli nor his uncle and Bard were privy to.

Finally, Sigrid spoke up. "It's my fault. I asked Fíli to insist on forgoing those traditions at our wedding," she offered in a tense voice.

"Why?" Bard asked, now sounding more like a concerned father than a king.

Sigrid definitely seemed to feel uncomfortable and Kíli was glad that his brother took the girl's hand into his to offer some kind of support. She gave him a small smile before turning towards her father and the King under the Mountain.

"Something... something happened to me. So I know that I won't be able to stand the feeling of male hands on me, tearing away my clothes while carrying me off to the bed I will share with my husband. And... and because of what happened to me, I won't bleed when my husband claims my body for the first time," Sigrid confessed.

Kíli could tell that his uncle and Bard were as shocked about this as he himself was.

"Oh, Sigrid... Who... When...?" Bard tried to ask, balling his hands into fists while there was a pained expression on his face.

Sigrid exchanged another glance with Fíli before answering her father's elliptical questions.

"It was a couple of years ago, after Ma had died of the fever and Tilda was still little and also very sick. I didn't know what to do, Da! You hadn't come home for two days and we didn't have any money left so I couldn't buy more medicine or supplies for her. Bain volunteered to go looking for you in the taverns at the wharfs where you usually stopped by then, but he was only a lad of twelve and it was getting dark, I couldn't let him go! So I went in his stead, but I couldn't find you. That was when three men said that they knew where you were and that they would escort me there... I'm sure you can imagine the rest," she revealed, crying.

Bard turned pale.

"It was my fault, then. You went looking for me because I used to spend my hard-earned money on cheap wine and poor booze in order to drown my grief instead of taking care of my children! If Greta had been alive, she would have taken the three of you and left me instantly. She loved you so much, all three of you, but you were her first-born, Sigrid, her pride and joy. If she knew what you had to endure because of my failure..."

And then the King of Dale started sobbing, burying his face in his hands.

In an instant, Sigrid got up from her chair, rushing over to her father, embracing him.

"It's not your fault Da, if anybody is to blame then it is those vile men who took pleasure in violating and humiliating an innocent, young girl," she declared.

Kíli noticed that he was also crying over what had happened to Sigrid. And now he understood why it had mainly been this human girl who had tended to Tauriel after what had happened on Ravenhill.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Your input is very much appreciated!


	6. Girl Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sigrid visits Tauriel in her rooms.

When Tauriel opened the door to her chambers, she was surprised to see Sigrid standing in front of it.

The girl smiled at her. "Hello, Tauriel, can I come in?" she asked politely.

Tauriel reciprocated the smile, opening the door completely.

"Of, course! Come on in!"

Sigrid didn't need to be told twice.

It had been a while since their last encounter and definitely longer since they had talked openly.

Tauriel remembered well enough how the human girl had visited her after Legolas had brought her to the ruins of the city which once had been Dale where they had started to tend to the injured. Luckily enough, there had been a special building just for females who had been harmed and that was where Tauriel had stayed then, letting human and elven healers tend to her wounds while her cheeks had burned with shame because it was obvious what had happened to her.

Tauriel had just been given some draughts to soothe her pain and calm her down, when a dishevelled looking young girl had made her presence known, "Tauriel? Tilda mentioned that you have been brought to Dale, injured, but I didn't believe her at first... What happened?"

And seeing the concern in those kind silver-and-gold-flecked blue eyes of a child of men, Tauriel had lost her composure completely, crying, telling her everything that had transpired on Ravenhill, how the orcs had forced Kíli to take her against his and her will, taunting them, how the bond had taken, that she had been married in body and soul then and there.

At first, Sigrid had just been listening but after Tauriel had finished her tale, she had sat down on Tauriel's cot, sharing her own story of violation. From this moment on, the two females had shared a special bond.

"So, what brings you to Erebor? Some diplomatic mission?" Tauriel finally asked after the two of them were seated in the armchairs in front of the fireplace.

Sigrid bit her lower lip, trying to hide a smile. "My Da has finally accepted Fíli's proposal and he and the King under the Mountain have negotiated the details of the contracts of our betrothal and our marriage, that's why I'm here!" she declared.

Tauriel felt happy for the girl, knowing that she and Fíli had been courting since Kíli's and her wedding.

"Oh Sigrid, that is wonderful!" she exclaimed, reaching out a hand to grab that of the girl and squeeze it, knowing that humans (like dwarves) loved some kind of physical display of affection.

"It is, isn't it?" Sigrid agreed, beaming at the elf. But then her face took on a serious expression.

"I've told them today," she whispered.

Tauriel needed a moment to understand what she meant. "You mean... you told them what happened to you when you were fourteen?" she asked.

Sigrid nodded. "Yes," she confirmed, "of course, Fíli already knew because I've told him as soon as we started our courtship, but today I admitted it to King Thorin and my father and, well, your husband since he insisted on staying in the council room while his uncle and my father negotiated my bride token and the details of our betrothal and marriage contracts. Oh, and Balin and Ori were also there."

Tauriel tensed. Poor Kíli! He was still so guilt-ridden about what he had been forced to do on Ravenhill that Sigrid's revelation must have been hard on him, reminding him of that dreadful day when they had lost their innocence and their dreams in the snow and the dirt...

"Tauriel?" Sigrid's voice rose her from her thoughts and Tauriel cleared her throat. "Sorry, I got a little bit distracted... It has been an eventful day so far," she admitted.

Sigrid studied her with a concerned expression on her pretty face. "Are you alright? You look kind of exhausted," she observed.

Tauriel smiled reassuringly at her, unconsciously touching her lower abdomen. "Yes, I'm fine though a little bit tired. Kíli woke me from my nap because he wanted to have lunch with me," she explained.

Sigrid drew her eyebrows together. "You? Napping? That sounds strange to me..." Then her eyes fell on Tauriel's hand still resting on her belly. Her eyes widened. "Unless... Is it true? Are you with child?" she asked bluntly.

Tauriel noticed that she might have involuntarily revealed her secret so there was only one answer.

"Yes," she confirmed and Sigrid's face lit up.

"Oh, Tauriel, this is wonderful! Kíli must be so happy!" she exclaimed and Tauriel nodded. "Oh, yes, that he is!" she remarked.

Sigrid leaned over to her and took both of Tauriel's hands into her slightly smaller ones, saying, "It seems that now everything will finally be alright for us, don't you think?"

Tauriel looked into the girl's eyes, studied her hopeful expression and suddenly had the feeling that the girl's words were true, that the worst was over now.

Their conversation turned to other topics afterward, Sigrid's and Fíli's betrothal feast, which should take place one week later, and their wedding which would be celebrated after Dís's, Fíli's and Kíli's mother's, arrival sometime in early spring.

Suddenly, Sigrid seemed to be worried, biting her lower lip while asking, "Do you think she will accept me?"

Tauriel smiled in a reassuring way. "I think she will - as soon as she finds out that her youngest has married an elf she will be glad that her eldest has at least settled for a daughter of men," she declared.

Sigrid chuckled. "So this is how your people call me - daughter of men?" she wanted to know.

"Well, not only us elves call your kind daughters and sons of men, the dwarves also do," Tauriel explained.

Sigrid looked surprised. "I didn't know that... But to be honest, I'm really concerned about meeting Fíli's mother," she confessed.

Tauriel sighed. "I can understand you. I feel the same, especially since some of those dwarrowdams who arrived with Dain and his army and who are currently living here in order to rebuild Erebor don't like me."

Sigrid gave her a sympathetic look. "Kíli told - or rather yelled - as much when barging into his uncle's study and I have to admit that this makes me also nervous, though Thorin has promised to talk to those dwarrowdams and he has cancelled your lessons with them until then," Sigrid revealed.

Tauriel raised an eyebrow when hearing this. "My lessons are cancelled? I didn't know. I would have thought that Kíli wanted to share this news with me," she answered.

Sigrid giggled. "Oh, I'm sure he wanted to do so until he got distracted by his big brother who asked him ' _to raise a glass in celebration of the betrothal_ ', as Fíli put it," she offered and Tauriel couldn't help but agree with her. Oh yes, that sounded like Fíli, and if Tauriel had learned anything during the time she had spent inside the mountain, it was that the brotherly bond between Kíli and Fíli was unusually deep and strong and no one - not even a spouse - could weaken the affection they had for each other.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You know that I appreciate your input, so please let me know what you think.


	7. Mother-in-law

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dís arrives at Erebor...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to thank everyone who has subscribed to this story or bookmarked it!  
> Thanks to all who are interested in reading it!

Dís arrived earlier than anyone had expected.

It was only one week after Fíli's and Sigrid's betrothal when four ponies with three dwarrows were spotted on the long winding road, leading from Dale to Erebor.

To everyone's surprise, it was the King's sister, accompanied by Glóin's wife and her young son, Gimli, standing at Erebor's front gate, demanding to be let in.

Bifur and Nori, who had been on guard duty, immediately sent one of the young dwarrows from the Iron Hills who were supporting them to go and get Thorin. So it happened that the King under the Mountain, still in his nightshirt and a pair of loose-fitting trousers, and his sister, wearing dust covered travelling clothes, met again after almost a year of separation.

"Oh, brother," she whispered, shaking her head, which caused the beads in her hair, securing numerous different braids, to jingle.

"Dís!" Thorin whispered coarsely, then he slowly extended his arms in a welcoming gesture.

Suddenly, Dís grinned from ear to ear, then she lunged at her brother like a little girl, not a grown dwarrowdam. They embraced tightly for several minutes, before Dís stepped back a little, frowning slightly. "What about my sons?" she asked.

Thorin smiled reassuringly. "Fíli and Kíli are fine. I believe you got my ravens..."

Dís interrupted him. "Of course. Why else would I have left the caravan to come here as soon as possible, riding almost non-stop?"

Thorin nodded. "Of course, you are eager to meet Kíli's wife and Fíli's betrothed... They are good lasses, believe me, Dís. Yet they might not be what you expect..." he explained vaguely.

"Yes, I already know, the ravens told me so. But I want to hear the truth: What is the secret about them?" Dís demanded to know.

Thorin opened his mouth to speak, but he was interrupted by one of his nephews, calling for their mother. "Amad!" It was clearly Kíli, only wearing his nightshirt; he hadn't even bothered to put on a pair of trousers or a dressing gown, unlike his older brother, who was hot on his heels, securing a pompous looking dressing gown in gold and blue around his stout frame.

Dís covered her mouth with both her hands, too overwhelmed by the sight. Her lads, all three of them, her brother and her sons, were standing right in front of her, safe and sound.

"Oh, my babies", Dís whispered, opening her arms. Immediately, her sons ran towards her, letting her take them into her arms as if they were still little striplings and not grown-up dwarrows. For a while they just clung to each other, Dís pressing kisses on blond curls and dark waves.

Finally she let go of them, looking deeply into Kíli's gold-brown eyes (unlike her own), then into Fíli's silver-blue ones (so much like her own), asking, "What's this rubbish about my little wolf being married and my little lion being betrothed?"

Both sons blushed. "Erm, yes, something happened and now I'm married and Tauriel's expecting," Kíli confessed.

Dís drew her eyebrows together, looking like a female version of her older brother. "Tauriel? That's an unusual name... And she is already expecting? How come I wasn't told?"

She turned towards her brother and Thorin turned bright red.

"Well, we only found out recently - she was very secretive about it. And I thought that the news about Fíli's sudden betrothal was enough for you to digest at the moment", he excused himself.

Dís snorted. "Yeah, sure. You are still keeping things from me, brother, like you used to when I was still a child. So, I'll not only be a mother-in-law but also a grandmother soon?" she inquired.

Kíli nodded his head. "Oh, yes. I'd like you to meet her now, though. Would you like to accompany me to her rooms, Amad?" he suggested.

Before Dís could answer, Thorin cleared his throat. "Not now, Kíli. I bet your mother would like to take a bath, have a decent meal and then some rest. She can meet your wife later," he declared.

This reaction caught Dís's interest. "Oh no, I'm still too excited from my ride here... And I can't wait to meet the young dwarrowdam who has turned my youngest head, making him marry at once!"

Kíli's eyes widened. "D-d-dwarrowdam? Erm... Amad, Tauriel is... she is not..." he stuttered.

Dís was alarmed. "What is she, Kíli? What's your wife's secret?

There was some maleficent cackle. "Oh, Dís, you have no idea what we have been forced to deal with... Do you remember the tales about the elf-witches we used to entertain ourselves with as children? Well, it seems that one of those has put her spell on your youngest... Our poor, innocent Prince Kíli!" It was Dain's wife Freya.

Dís gasped in shock. "Kíli, no...", she exclaimed.

"Amad, it's not like that! She... she saved his life! She saved our little Kíli's life. She didn't have to, but she did. Risking everything, even her own life! I was there, I saw it, as did Óin and Bofur," Fíli suddenly tried to help his brother.

Freya cackled again. "And you, _Prince Fíli_! Bringing one of those daughters of men to our mountain, one of those whores who spread their legs for everyone and everything. I bet she has done so countless of times for a handful of copper coins or some food! Nevertheless, you, our King's heir, you plan to make something like that queen when there are enough decent dwarrowdams around who would love to be your bride!" the blonde dwarrowdam spat.

After this statement, Fíli got furious. Really furious. Actually, Dís had only seen her son this angry when someone had attacked Kíli.

"Shut your mouth, will you! Sigrid is the purest female I have ever met, always putting others first, never harbouring a bad thought. I don't want you or any dwarrowdam besmirching her reputation," he yelled.

Freya just huffed, then she turned on her heel and strode back to where she came from.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, I'd like to know what you think!


	8. Visit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tauriel's and Dís's first encounter...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to thank all my readers for their interest, especially those who have subscribed to this story, bookmarked it, left kudos and comments.  
> Enjoy!

Of course, Tauriel heard the commotion outside her rooms.

Sighing, she put her book aside and got up from her comfortable armchair, instinctively casting a glance at the young girl sleeping in her bed. Tauriel smiled fondly when she thought back to Sigrid's late night visit. The girl had been very agitated because of her impending wedding and thus her wedding night...

 

_"What was it like for you? After everything that happened?" she wanted to know from Tauriel._

_The elf bit her lower lip, not knowing how to broach the subject. Then she decided to tell the plain truth._

_"Kíli and I didn't have a 'wedding night'. I... we couldn't... we didn't want to be intimate after the events on Ravenhill," she declared, "And there was no need for us. According to the laws of my people we were already married and with regard to dwarven customs, the act is not needed to validate a marriage. The signatures on a contract are more important."_

_Sigrid blushed, hanging her head._

_Tauriel tentatively touched her forearm."Talk to Fíli. I'm sure he will understand if you don't want to share his bed," she suggested._

_But Sigrid shook her head, looking up again. "No, I won't talk to him about this. I know that he loves me and that he cares for me, meaning that he would respect my wish to not be intimate with him. But I think that he deserves to have a normal bride who is able to do her conjugal duty. I want to do this for him. Besides, Fíli and I want to have children - we already talked about it. So, even if I avoid coupling with him on my wedding night, I will have to do so at some point. Yet I'm terribly afraid that it will be painful and embarrassing for me, that I will disappoint him," the girl confessed._

_Tauriel smiled fondly at her. "Maybe you should tell him. Fíli is kind and gentle, he will understand and try everything to make you feel comfortable," she explained. It was strange for her to have such a conversation, let alone giving someone advice on that matter, having no real experience herself except for... She didn't want to think about that._

 

After their conversation, Sigrid had asked Tauriel if she could stay with her for the night, confessing that she had trouble sleeping all alone since she was used to sharing a bed with her little sister. Tauriel remembered vividly Tilda's sobbing and Sigrid's silent tears when it had been time for the sisters to say their goodbyes the morning after Sigrid's betrothal to Fíli since the young human would stay with her husband-to-be in Erebor - of course in her own rooms - while Tilda had to go back to Dale with her father. Nevertheless, Tilda would visit her big sister every weekend.

When Tauriel reached the door, she took another look at Sigrid who was still sleeping peacefully. Tauriel frowned. The girl looked so young in her sleep, too young to be married, actually. Yet she had been told that according to human standards, Sigrid was old enough.

More noise was coming from the corridor. Tauriel definitely recognized Kíli's voice (and she hated to admit it but she could also feel his agitation due to their bond), then some other voices (one belonged to Thorin, the other to Fíli and then two more to females).

Assuming that some small catastrophe was taking place (why else would Kíli be out of bed at dawn), she opened the door and stepped in the corridor, moving towards the source of the disturbance, only to be almost run over by a furious Freya.

Immediately, Tauriel stepped aside, not wanting to agitate the unpleasant dwarrowdam any further (and from her lessons, Tauriel already knew how vile Dain's wife could be, although since Sigrid was attending those lessons together with her, it wasn't as bad as before).

Fortunately, Freya didn't seem to notice her (or didn't want to notice her).

So, Tauriel just let the dwarrowdam pass and continued her way. And then, she saw them, the small group standing close together in the well-lit corridor, Thorin and Fíli and Kíli, all of them in their nightclothes (like her; she was also wearing nothing but a nightshirt and a dressing gown, her hair unbound except for her marriage and motherhood braids). However, they were not alone; a dwarrowdam who looked a lot like Thorin, with dark hair and blue eyes, wearing light-brown deer skin britches, a blue tunic and a heavy, fur-trimmed travelling cloak in dark grey, as well as matching boots, was with them while another group of dwarves was standing further away; Tauriel recognized Óin and Glóin as well as another, strange dwarrowdam and a strange, young dwarrow who looked a lot like Glóin.

However, Tauriel's advent did not go unnoticed. The dark haired dwarrowdam looked past Thorin, Fíli and Kíli and directly at her. Immediately, Tauriel knew that this had to be Kíli's mother and she froze.

"Is this her?" the dwarrowdam asked sharply, causing Fíli, Kíli and Thorin to turn into her direction.

Kíli beamed at her, exclaiming "Yes, this is my wife!"

Tauriel's heart dropped as soon as she saw the dwarrowdam frowning, yet she was beckoning Tauriel to draw nearer. "Come here, lass, I'd like to see the elf who has charmed my baby boy!" she ordered and Tauriel obeyed.

Slowly she went to the impressive dwarrowdam, her previous encounters with the females of her husband's race fresh on her mind.

"So, you are Tauriel, my Kíli's wife, the elf who is already expecting not even four months after her wedding?" the dwarrowdam asked.

Tauriel nodded. "Yes, My lady," she answered meekly.

The dwarrowdam tutted. "Cut out that nonsense! We are family. No need to call me 'My lady' or 'princess'. I'm Dís," she explained with a slight smirk.

Somehow Tauriel felt that this dwarrowdam meant her no harm.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's short...  
> Yet your input is always appreciated!


	9. Sigrid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dís meets Sigrid...

Dís studied the tall and beautiful elf with a raised eyebrow. "How old are you, lass?" she wanted to know.

Tauriel cleared her throat. "I'm six-hundred and fifty years old, yet this is quite young for my people," she declared.

Dís snorted. "And here I am, calling you _lass_ ," she remarked.

Immediately, Kíli was at Tauriel's side. "I think that age doesn't matter... Besides, Sigrid is only seventeen years old!" he exclaimed.

Dís drew her eyebrows together. "Sigrid? Fíli just mentioned that name..." she said.

The blond dwarf sighed. "Yes, Amad. Sigrid is my betrothed. And she is a daughter of men," he confessed.

Dís nodded slowly. Then she asked, "Why did you choose such a young girl?"

Fíli's eyes widened. "Why? Because she is my One, of course!" he answered.

Dís smiled smugly. "That's what I wanted to hear. And now I want to meet her as well before I take a bath, have a decent breakfast with my family and then take a nap," she explained.

Thorin nodded. "Very well. I'll escort you to her rooms and I'm sure that Fíli wants to join us?"

Fíli snorted. "You bet, Uncle," he said but Tauriel cleared her throat. "Erm, Sigrid isn't in her rooms... She is sleeping in mine!"

Fíli and Kíli looked at her curiously.

"Why? Doesn't she like the rooms I have prepared for her?" Fíli inquired.

Tauriel shook her head. "No, it's not that, she just isn't used to sleeping alone, that's all, because she is missing her little sister," the elf explained.

Kíli shot his brother a dirty grin. "Oh, I'm sure Fíli would like to help her out with not sleeping alone!"

Fíli growled. "Just shut up, will you!" he exclaimed.

Dís cleared her throat. "Lads, stop it!" she scolded her sons and they fell silent. Then the beautiful dwarrowdam nodded before smiling at Tauriel. "Well, then, lass, lead the way! I'm eager to meet this daughter of men who has stolen my Fíli's heart!" she declared.

Tauriel couldn't help but smile back, then she walked down the corridor towards her room while the others followed.

Carefully, Tauriel opened the door to her chambers. "Please be quiet. Poor Sigrid's nerves aren't the best at the moment due to her wedding and the wedding preparations," she addressed the others, then stepped inside the semi-dark room; the fireplace was still lit and a gaslight was still resting on the table next to Tauriel's armchair.

Silently, she walked over to her bed, placing a hand on Sigrid's shoulder, trying to rouse the young girl. "Sigrid?" she whispered and the girl stirred, sighing slightly in her sleep.

"Sigrid! We have some visitors," Tauriel explained, lightly shaking the other's shoulder.

Sigrid took a deep breath, then opened her lake-blue eyes, immediately drawing her eyebrows together. "Tauriel? What time is it? Are we supposed to meet the others for breakfast now?" she asked confused, sitting up in bed and rubbing her eyes.

"Wow, she is rather cute like that!" Dís commented and Tauriel closed her eyes. If Sigrid hadn't noticed the small party standing in the doorway before, she definitely would have now.

"Oh," was all that the girl said, clutching the blankets and furs close to her chest.

Dís stepped into the room. "No need to be shy, lass, I'm just your future mother-in-law," she remarked, giving the girl a loopsided grin that reminded Tauriel of Fíli.

Sigrid's eyes widened in shock. "Oh! I'm sorry, my Lady, I didn't know that I would meet you today. Please excuse my dishevelled appearance," Sigrid apologised, running a hand through her curls that had come loose from her braid.

Dís tutted again. "Please, we'll soon be family, so you can just call me Dís, sweetheart" she explained before turning towards Fíli and Kíli. "Honestly, where did you two idiots find such fine females who know how to address nobility properly?"

The brothers exchanged a glance. "Erm..." Kíli started but was interrupted by Fíli nudging him.

"I don't think that Amad really wants to hear an answer!"

The brunet frowned. "Oh..."

Thorin, however, cleared his throat. "So, Dís, you have now met Fíli's betrothed and Kíli's wife. It's still early and the lasses are not properly dressed, like your sons and myself. Why don't you take that bath now while we all get ready and then have breakfast together in the King's Hall? I'm sure that the other members of the company want to join us," he suggested and Dís sniggered.

"The King's Hall? Really Thorin? Was it your idea to name the former Common Room like that?" she asked teasingly.

This time, it was Fíli who cleared his throat. "No, Amad. Actually it was Balin who came up with the term in order to remind some of Dain's followers to pay their due respects - they had started to question Uncle's choices after he had announced Kíli's betrothal to an elf," he elaborated.

Dís narrowed her eyes. "Oh, did they? Well, I guess they've never heard about the concept of having a One... Although I must admit that your choices are rather odd, Fíli, Kíli," Dís commented.

Kíli snorted. "Oh, Amad, wait until you find out that Uncle has chosen a male Hobbit as his consort!" he revealed.

Dís raised her eyebrows. "Well, Nadad, that really sounds interesting. I think you forgot to mention that in your messages..." the dwarrowdam said, her eyes sparkling.

Thorin gasped. "Bilbo is my trusted friend and a very good advisor, that's why he agreed to stay in Erebor until everything is settled..." Thorin defended himself.

Kíli snorted again. "Yeah, sure, I always present my friends with very valuable gifts in front of my kin," the young dwarf answered.

Tauriel and Sigrid exchanged a look. Somehow this conversation had diverted from them and their position to the King under the Mountain and his _burglar_. Maybe it was a good sign, meaning that Dís, Fíli's and Kíli's mother, was okay with her sons' choices for brides.

This time, however, it was Thorin who cleared his throat. "Bilbo can stay as long as he wants in Erebor- since he helped us to reclaim it. And I don't want anyone - not even my nephews - to besmirch my relationship to him," the King under the Mountain declared.

"Anyway, guys, I'd really like to have that bath now you've already promised me," Dís interjected and Thorin nodded.

"Of course. I'll send for a servant to escort you to the rooms I have prepared for you," Thorin answered and Dís smiled.

"Thank you!" she said and with that the dwarves left Tauriel's rooms, leaving a confused elf and daughter of men in their wake.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know what you think!


	10. Dís

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Dís leant back in the bath tub, sighing contently. The hot, fragrant water felt too good, almost as good as the strong pair of arms wrapped around her middle..." Who is Dís's lover?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unbetaed.  
> Enjoy!

Dís leant back in the bath tub, sighing contently. The hot, fragrant water felt too good, almost as good as the strong pair of arms wrapped around her middle, the broad chest she was resting against.

"I've missed this, missed you," she mumbled sleepily while placing her slightly smaller hands atop his bigger ones, entwining their fingers.

"Missed you too... You have no idea how lonely I've felt on the road," her best friend, her companion, her lover answered.

Dís raised an eyebrow, slightly turning in his arms so that she could look into his honest brown eyes.

"You felt lonely? How so? You were constantly surrounded by twelve dwarves, one hobbit and a wizard! I was the one who stayed behind in an empty house because my sons, my brother and my lover decided to go on a perilous quest," she replied passionately.

"Am I this, Dís? Am I your lover?" he asked coolly.

"You know what you are to me!" she answered firmly.

He just shrugged. "I'm a warrior, always have been, too low for you. And you are a princess, always have been, too noble for me. It was just a dream, a dream, we seem to refuse to leave behind, still, after all those years" he said sadly.

Dís couldn't help but grab his beard, pulling his face down for a kiss. He submitted himself to her, to her urges, as always. It was a slow, sensual kiss, conveying everything they felt for each other, all the love and affection.

They weren't each other's Ones though, they weren't married. He was a warrior, through and through, completely devoted to his profession and to his king and she was a princess, through and through, devoted to her brother and his foolish cause, providing him with the heirs he was unwilling to sire himself.

And their union, the union between the warrior and the princess, had been fruitful.

He had proved to be virile enough to sire those heirs for his king and she had been fertile enough to conceive and bear them for her brother; two princes for the line of Durin, two heirs for her brother and his king.

And that was the reason why her sons were fatherless, although her brother had acknowledged them as his rightful heirs, naming them, claiming them as his own, while their real father had stood by, had said nothing, had even been afraid to hold them, his own flesh and blood. Dís remembered.

"I'm too clumsy! Balin always says so! Amad always said so! If I hold him while he's still so tiny and fragile, I might just crush his bones and then you and Thorin would hate me," he had answered when Dís had tried to hand him his first-born, their Fíli, the golden one. And then, five years later, the same scene had repeated itself when Kíli, the dark one, had been born.

Nevertheless, despite his reluctance to hold the babies after birth, he had been there with her, for her, in the birthing chamber, supporting her, encouraging her, three times, during the births of their living sons and even during the birth of their stillborn daughter, Thyri, Fíli's and Kíli's little sister; Dís hadn't been able to leave her bed for a month afterwards, barely eating or sleeping, while Dwalin and Thorin had taken care of her and her sons.

They had never tried again for another child after the loss of their little girl, of their Thyri, asking Óin for herbs and other methods to avoid a pregnancy because they knew they would not survive another loss like this.

However, their love for each other, for their children, had grown stronger, though he would always be "Mister Dwalin" to her sons while they would follow their uncle to battle and death.

And suddenly Dís remembered the promises they had given her, her sons, her brother, her lover.

"We'll come back to you, Amad, safe and sound, you'll see," Kíli, her lively, cheerful Kíli had said.

"Yes, I'll look after him. Save his sorry ass, if necessary. Oh, and Uncle's," Fíli, earnest and reliable Fíli, had contributed and Dís had embraced them tightly, her sons, her lion and her wolf, her everything.

"Come back to me, brother!" she had ordered and while he was hugging her tightly like he hadn't done since she had come of age, he had answered, "Aye, I will, Dís. And I will have reclaimed our home with your sons and your lover at my side when I do!"

It had been the first time that Thorin had acknowledged his little sister's love affair.

Dwalin, however, had been the last one to come to her. They had spent the night together, making love, crying, making promises, hoping... And then she had asked something of him, of her warrior, that had almost seemed impossible. "Keep them safe, all of them, Dwalin, not only our sons but also my brother!" she had demanded and his humble answer had been, "Aye, I will!"

And now Dís had to admit that Dwalin had kept his word.

"Thank you," she breathed, "Thank you for keeping them alive!"

Dwalin, however, seemed to feel uncomfortable. "Oh, don't thank me, I didn't do anything, it was all done by those blasted elves... and this irritable hobbit and the shrewd daughter of men," he confessed.

Dís chuckled, burying her face in his chest. "Oh, I guess you don't want me to thank them the way I have intended to thank you!"

And as Dís had anticipated, her warrior succumbed to her and her attempts at seducing him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know what you think!


	11. Thinking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "As soon as Dwalin entered the King's Hall for breakfast, he knew it had been a mistake to bathe together with Dís in rose-scented water..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is from Dwalin's point of view. Enjoy!

As soon as Dwalin entered the King's Hall for breakfast, he knew it had been a mistake to bathe together with Dís in rose-scented water.

Nori just sniggered until Dori nudged him with his elbow, Balin only raised an eyebrow, shaking his head, and Bofur winked at him. "Couldn't keep it in your pants, could you? Aye, don't worry, I understand. We've been on the road for quite a while and Dís is really a very attractive dwarrowdam," he said.

Dwalin just growled at him while taking his seat next to his brother. Of course, he wasn't seated next to her; he would never be. Because he wasn't her husband. No, Dís was seated at the High Table, between her brother and her youngest son, right where she belonged, like all the other members of the royal family; Fíli sat on Thorin's other side and next to him sat his betrothed, the girl from lake-town, then Dain's daughters, Drífa und Frída, his wife Freya, Daín and finally his son and heir, Thorin Stonehelm. Next to Kíli sat his wife, the red-haired elf Kíli had been head over heels with since Mirkwood. The fact that she had saved his life in Lake-town before the dragon had come might have deepened his crush on her.

However, Dwalin didn't know why, but somehow they behaved oddly around each other now that they were married and expecting. Of course, he could see the affection in Kíli's eyes when he looked at her and he could see the fondness in her eyes when she looked at Kíli, yet they seemed to avoid direct eye contact. And they barely touched. Something must have happened on Ravenhill, explaining why Kíli and the elf had married that soon after the battle.

At first Dwalin had thought that maybe the lass had once again saved Kíli's life and that it was due to Thorin's gratefulness that he had allowed them to marry that fast without a real courting period and a very short betrothal period. Yet to Dwalin, they didn't appear to be madly in love.

Then he concluded that maybe something sinister took place on Ravenhill. Thorin had hinted at something like that. They had been at war after all and the orcs were foul creatures...

She wouldn't have been the first female to be violated by them; that was the reason why dwarrowdams disguised themselves as males, wearing britches and fake beards while travelling; the females of their race were so few in numbers that they were highly treasured and protected at all costs. Thinking that Dís, the princess, had left the safety of her caravan behind, travelling only with another dwarrowdam and an battle-untested dwarfling, made Dwalin's stomach clench. So much could have happened to them, to her, his heart and soul. Although Dís was convinced that they weren't each other's Ones, Dwalin thought differently. He knew, deep in his heart, that Dís was his One, yet he would never tell her because he knew that she would immediately end their... Whatever it was that they had in order to spare his feelings.

Bell-like laughter from the High Table roused Dwalin from his musings; it was Sigrid, the girl from lake-town, Bard's eldest daughter and Fíli's betrothed. He was whispering something into her ear while grinning like an idiot. Oh, those two were definitely in love. Watching Thorin's heir and his bride-to-be immediately brought Dwalin's attention back to the spare and his wife, to Kíli and Tauriel and what might have happened to them on Ravenhill. Could it really be true that Bolg and the other orcs had taken the elf by force and made Kíli watch this despicable act?

It would explain their awkward behaviour... if it weren't for the fact that elves normally faded after being violated. Dwalin was definitely no scholar - unlike his brother - but that much he knew about elves. And while Tauriel really did look a little pale and less radiating than she had done when being their jailer in Mirkwood, she seemed too be rather healthy and strong.

No, there was no way that the elf had been violated. But what was Tauriel and Kíli's secret, then?

Involuntarily, Dwalin's thoughts wandered into another direction. Maybe they had been madly in love and wanted to be married immediately and then their wedding night had turned out to be rather unsatisfactory? Kíli was young and inexperienced, maybe he didn't know how to do things right. Mahal, Dwalin remembered how clumsy he had been during his first time with Dís. But she had been so patient with him, guiding him, showing him what she liked.

Maybe the elf had been disappointed with Kíli and his... talents (or lack thereof) in the bedroom. If the lad had only come to him... Maybe he should talk to Kíli, disclosing a secret or two. Female bodies were rather complicated and Dwalin would be glad to share his knowledge.

Smiling smugly, he reached for the pans with scrambled eggs and bacon, with fried eggs and sausages, piling the food onto his plate, pouring himself a cup of strong tea.

"Oh, worked up an appetite, didn't you?" Bofur commented, winking at him, and Dwalin growled again. Everyone in this hall and especially the members of the company knew about his relationship to Dís, knew that he had sired her sons without her ever acknowledging him as a husband or as the father of her children. She was the Princess of Erebor, destined to rule at her brother's side, bearing his heirs because he didn't want to marry and sire them himself.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know what you think... I really appreciate your feedback:)


	12. Talking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kíli and Tauriel are talking over breakfast.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, slowly but surely Tauriel and Kíli are fixing their impaired relationship...  
> Enjoy!

Once again, Tauriel cursed her good hearing.

This time, however, it wasn't due to what was said about her (or Sigrid - she had gotten used to this by now) but due to what was said about Dís.

Tauriel's mother-in-law had been a total surprise, so welcoming and cordial - despite the fact that her sons were involved with an elf and a daughter of men respectively - and the first dwarrowdam Tauriel had felt comfortable around.

So she couldn't help but feel offended by Freya's whispered comment, "Oh, look, there comes Dís's breeding bull," and her daughters' sniggering when Dwalin entered the King's Hall.

Of course, Tauriel understood the connotation, knowing full well that Kíli (and Fíli) had been sired by the grim looking warrior (Kíli and Fíli's scent was almost identical to his, meaning that they must be close kin and not distant relatives), yet she didn't understand the derogatory term, despite the fact that Dís and Dwalin had definitely made love before breakfast (since their scent was intermingled now, unlike before, when Dís had solely smelled of wool and herbs, she now also smelled of metal and leather, precisely Dwalin's scent, whereas there was a strange and distinct aroma of wool and herbs coming from him now, not to mention the odour of rose-scented bathing oil that surrounded them both).

Yes, Tauriel's olfactory sense was as keen as her other senses.

"Do you want some scrambled eggs and fried tomatoes?" Kíli asked suddenly, offering her a cast-iron skillet.

"Oh, well, yes, thank you," Tauriel answered politely, taking the pan from him, putting some of the food onto her plate, then giving it back to him so that he could pass it on to the others.

"Bilbo also got some blueberries and there is some whipped cream - both would go extra-ordinarily well with Bombur's waffers... And since you are eating for two..." Kíli remarked and Tauriel stiffened. She knew full well what her body needed, what her daughter... their daughter needed.

"Thank you, but maybe later," she answered pointedly and Kíli slumped his shoulders.

Of course, she had offended him again, him and his efforts. He only meant well!

"I'm sorry," she whispered, "but you know full well that I don't eat as much as you and your kin do!"

Kíli grinned at her sheepishly. "Well, I always forget... I remember when Amad was expecting Thyri..."

He suddenly interrupted himself, looking fearfully at his mother, sitting next to him.

Tauriel drew her eyebrows together. "Thyri?" she wanted to know.

"My little sister. She is dead, though, died in my mother's womb before she was born..." he confessed silently.

"Oh, Kíli, that's awful! I'm so, so sorry to hear that," Tauriel answered.

Kíli just shrugged. "It was a long time ago. I was only a little stripling then..." he answered and grabbed his cup of tea, taking a long swig.

Tauriel felt that the death of his little sister affected him more than he wanted to let on and so she decided to change the subject. Clearing her throat, she remarked, "I'm so excited for your brother's and Sigrid's wedding! I guess it will be a rather splendid feast since it is the joining of royal families. And since it will include the traditions of dwarves and men... Is it true that dwarvish wedding ceremonies normally last a week? The dwarrowdams told me during one of my lessons that the wedding guests will party for about a week!"

Kíli put his cup down and nodded, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. "Aye, that's true. Though the newlyweds are not expected to take part in the festivities after the bedding ceremony," he elaborated.

Tauriel sighed. "I know. Though there won't be a bedding ceremony at Fíli's and Sigrid's wedding. The dwarrowdams already complained about that, saying that for them it's only a real wedding when the couple is honouring all traditions... which we didn't as well," she confessed, biting her lower lip.

Kíli buried his face in his hands. "I can't believe how mean the dwarrowdams are to you... Of course, ours was a real wedding! We signed contracts, we braided each other's hair, we exchanged gifts, we shared meat and mead with our kin, with our friends and allies and that's enough! It's legal and it's binding... Those dwarrowdams should know..." he declared firmly, almost scowling like his uncle, mother and brother.

Tauriel had to suppress a giggle. While the scowl looked intimidating on Thorin, threatening on Dís and determined on Fíli, it looked adorable on Kíli. His cheerful face was definitely better suited for smiling. Tentatively, Tauriel placed her hand on his arm. They still avoided unnecessary touching, so her gesture seemed to surprise him, especially since it was a public display of affection. Therefore, he looked at her with wide eyes. Tauriel gave him an indulgent smile.

"Don't be mad at them! I think they just have problems to adjust to the situation that an elf is living among their midst. And now a daughter of men as well! And a hobbit... Your people are very secretive, maybe they are afraid that too many of your customs and mysteries will be revealed to outsiders," she suggested.

Kíli frowned. "Maybe you are right. Although I think it is also due to the fact that there are more females among other races than our own and when the line of Durin can choose brides from other races, why shouldn't other dwarves as well? The dwarrowdams would then not be considered as special and precious as they are know. So, maybe they are only jealous," he remarked thoughtfully.

"Maybe," Tauriel just answered, not telling her husband that this had exactly been her thought.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Your comments are very much appreciated, so please let me know what you think!


	13. First Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tauriel and Kíli share a special moment during Fíli and Sigrid's wedding.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Long time, no update, I know. I hope you are still interested.  
> Please enjoy!

Fíli and Sigrid's wedding feast was as splendid as Tauriel had expected it to be.

There were lots of exquisite foods and drinks, singing and dancing, carefree laughter and animated conversations.

Tauriel's gaze wandered towards Fíli and Kíli who were smiling at each other before clinking glasses, then downing their ale; both princes wearing formal attire, consisting of dark blue britches, white tunics and dark blue jerkins, on Fíli's head there was a small golden crown, on Kíli's a silver circlet.

The bride, currently talking to her mother-in-law (in a pompous wine-red brocade gown), was wearing a gorgeous dress, made from white and golden taffeta and brocade as well as a veil made from the finest white lace and topped by a crown made from the first flowers of spring. Her dark golden curls were arranged in an intricate half-up so that her different braids which declared that she was the bride of a member of the royal family – Fíli's to be more precisely – were visible. She looked so happy!

Tauriel vividly remembered her own wedding feast... She hadn't worn a real wedding dress because there had been no time to sew one on such a short notice, meaning that she had dressed in some rendered attire Sigrid had found in the ruins of Dale; it had been a petrol blue taffeta dress with a tight bodice and flared skirts. Her hair had been arranged in a similar style as Sigrid's (yet her braids had shown that she had been Kíli's bride) and she hadn't worn a veil, only a flower-crown made from holly and evergreens.

Suddenly someone placed their hand over hers, rousing her from her musings. “Are you all right?”

It was Kíli, sitting down next to her.

Over the last couple of weeks they had been able to act more normal around each other, including her not flinching away from his touch and he being able to touch her without that guilt ridden expression on his face. Yet they were still sleeping in two different rooms...

Tauriel turned towards her husband, smiling at him. “Yes, I'm fine,” she answered.

He nodded, then he lowered his gaze towards her still flat belly. “And the baby?” he wanted to know.

Tauriel's smile widened while placing a hand on her lower abdomen. “She is fine too!” the elf explained.

“That's good,” Kíli said, lifting her hand to his lips and pressing a soft kiss to it, “You know, I can't wait to meet her... Do elves really carry their children for twelve months?”

This time, it was Tauriel who nodded. “Oh yes – which means that it will take a while until you will be able to meet her... However, she already recognizes your voice! I can feel her joy whenever you talk to me... or her,” Tauriel revealed.

Kíli looked confused. “How is this possible? For you to know that it's a girl and even understand her feelings when she is still so tiny?” he asked.

Tauriel sighed. “I don't know, it's just the way it is with my people...”she answered, then frowned, before inquiring, “Does this mean the women of your race don't know the gender of their babes before they are born? Don't they have a special connection with their unborn children?”

Kíli shrugged. “If they have, they don't talk about it. Yet Thorin and Fíli told me that my mother was convinced I would be a girl before I was born and apparently she was wrong! So, no, I don't think that our women have this special connection, at least not to the same extent your people have.”

He fell silent for a moment before requesting shyly, “May I... May I touch your belly? Maybe then I will be able to feel her the way you do since we are sharing this special bond?”

Tauriel hesitated for a moment. She was okay with him touching her hand, her shoulder or her back, with him kissing her cheek, her forehead or even her lips... Yet touching her belly was a whole new level of intimacy... Would she be able to stand it? Or would it bring back the memories from Raven Hill?

There was only one way to find out!

Slowly she took her husband's hand and placed it carefully on her lower abdomen, her heart beating wildly, then slowing down as soon as she became aware how much this gesture seemed to make her unborn child happy.

And not only the child: Kíli beamed at her as if it were Durin's Day and his Nameday at the same time.

“I think I can feel her... There's... there's a flutter under my palm. Is this even possible? And... And there is warmth... comfort. Oh, Tauriel, does that mean I can feel her like your people do?” he wanted to know.

Tauriel placed her hand firmly over his. “Yes, when she moves within me, I can feel it. That's the flutter you mentioned. And this feeling of warmth and comfort... I think that's what I feel when she is content. So, yes, our bond works even like this!” she declared and looked deeply into his eyes.

It wasn't the first time that she noticed the rich brown colour they had, like the earth, yet with amber flecks, and a part of her wondered what their daughter would look like. Would she have green eyes like her mother? Or brown eyes, like her father? Or even a mixture of both? And the baby's hair! Would it be red and silky like hers or dark and rebellious like his?

For the first time Tauriel felt joy and excitement with regard to her condition, like a normal mother-to-be, not only worries and sorrow, and overwhelmed by this rush of emotions she bend down in order to press her lips to her husband's.

Kíli made a surprised sound, then he grabbed her waist, deepening the kiss, while she buried her hands instinctively in his hair.

It was the first time they kissed like this, like lovers, and when the tip of his tongue touched the seam of her lips, begging for entrance, she surrendered herself to him and their kiss.

For Tauriel, it wasn't only the first real kiss she shared with her husband, it was her first real kiss at all and for the first time in her life Tauriel understood what it meant to feel desire for someone.

She didn't care that they were at her brother-in-law's wedding feast, that they were seated at the high table so that all the wedding guests were able to see them kissing like that, her hands meanwhile on the back of his neck, his hands almost indecently low on her hips... Until somebody cleared their throat.

Immediately, Tauriel and Kíli let go of each other, looking surprised and shocked at the person who had dared to interrupt their heated kiss.

It were Fíli and Sigrid.

Bridegroom and bride were holding hands, an amused smile on each of their faces.

“It's good to see you two so in love, yet maybe you can keep it a little less passionate while still in public, okay? People are staring,” Fíli said winking at them.

Tauriel lowered her gaze blushing. She had behaved in an inappropriate way in front of her husband's kin, shaming him and herself.

“Tauriel? Fíli was just joking! Nobody was staring at you. You are husband and wife and this is a wedding, people are drunk and exuberant, so don't worry!”, Sigrid relented, putting her hand on Tauriel's shoulder.

The elf looked at her sister-in-law and saw nothing but kindness and friendship in the girl's eyes.

“And why did you two interrupt us then?”, Kíli asked challengingly.

Fíli shrugged. “We need a fourth couple for the next dance – a quadrille,” he answered.

Kíli and Tauriel shared a glance. Of course, Tauriel had been taught the typical dwarven dances, yet she wasn't sure if she wanted to flaunt herself in front of the others like that...

“Who are the other couples, then?” Kíli inquired.

“Well, me and Sigrid, obviously, Amad and Dwalin, Uncle Thorin and Bilbo... and you two, hopefully!” Fíli remarked.

Tauriel and Kíli shared another glance, then Tauriel nodded slightly, which made Kíli happy, as she could see.

“Okay, Fí, count us in!” he said, then he stood up, extending his hand towards Tauriel, which she accepted and let her herself being led to the dancefloor by her husband.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I borrowed the term and meaning of "Nameday" from George R.R. Martin's world.  
> Please let me know what you think!


	14. Memories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tauriel remembers...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter, yay!  
> I hope you enjoy.

Tauriel enjoyed herself during the dance more than she thought was possible. And it wasn't only because she participated actively but also because she seemed to be surrounded by loving couples, like Fíli and Sigrid, her mother-in-law and Dwalin, the King under the Mountain and his Hobbit.

It showed her what her wedding feast could have been like if it hadn't been for the rush with which it had been planned and executed.

She and Kíli hadn't even been able to dance since her leg had still been healing!

At least her wedding feast had been more splendid than her betrothal feast a week earlier. Tauriel remembered very well Thranduil's disgusted expression as he had entered her room at the house in Dale which had been used for the women who had been injured during the battle...

 

“ _Let's just get it over and done with,” the elvenking whispered to his son before inclining his head towards her. “Tauriel, my dear, it's so good to see you,” he greeted the elf-maid sitting on her bed, before taking his seat in one of the chairs provided for the guests, Legolas following his example, yet without looking at her._

_Tauriel, who was wearing a khaki wool dress she had borrowed from one of the women here because her own attire had been ruined, blushed. Her leg, although set and bandaged, was still hurting, so she couldn't walk long distances – one of the reasons for the betrothal taking place in a makeshift House of Healing. But worse than the pain was the shame she felt because everyone who would be a part of the betrothal feast knew about what had happened on Ravenhill, that she and Kíli had been forced to... in front of the orcs..._

_And yet, she had more to worry about than the events on Ravenhill and what the others might think about it; she was still bleeding and hurting down there, and although Sigrid had told her that after her rape she had been bleeding and hurting for about a week, Tauriel was an elf, meaning that she healed faster than humans... Why did her body still remind her then of what had happened?_

_And it wasn't only about the hurting and bleeding..._

_Although she didn't know what it should feel like to be with child, she was convinced that this was the case with her; there was no other explanation for the feeling of warmth and life spreading inside her belly. Yet she didn't understand how it had happened. Of course, she wasn't stupid, so the fact that Kíli had been forced to spill inside of her had something to do with it. But she had learned that elves created a new life willingly, meaning that the parents wished for a child when lying together and then it would happen._

_But she hadn't wished for a child when Kíli had been forced to claim her body and she was sure that Kíli hadn't either. Yet she was expecting!_

_Maybe it had something to do with Kíli not being an elf and him being in love with her..._

_Tauriel's musings were interrupted when Kíli entered the room, followed by his brother and uncle. The elvenking and the King under the Mountain nodded at each other before Thorin and his nephews took their seats; Kíli next to her on the bed and his brother and uncle in the chairs opposite Thranduil and Legolas._

_There were two more chairs in the room, for their witnesses, Balin and Gandalf, who would also bring the betrothal contract with them which she had to sign, together with Kíli and their legal guardians (which was ridiculous since they were both of age)._

_Legolas had informed her the night before that Thorin even had to pay a bride token for her as it was customary for dwarves since the women of their race were very precious (yet Tauriel didn't like that concept because to her it sounded as if she was being sold), which actually made Thranduil happy because this way he was able to reclaim the heirloom of his people, the white gems of Eryn Lasgalen._

_It didn't take long until Balin scurried into the room, holding a scroll in his hands and frowning at everyone present, followed by Mithrandir in his grey gown and hat, studying everyone before taking his seat whereas Balin remained standing, announcing the reason for their gathering._

“ _My dearest friends, family and allies,” he started while unrolling the scroll, “Today we have gathered here to condone the union between a daughter of the wood and a son of Durin. Since the union is already legal and binding according to elven law, there is no possibility for anyone present to object to this match; this gathering is merely a formality in order to honour our dwarfish customs. Of course, the lass will be living with Prince Kíli and his kin after their wedding next week, so the King under the Mountain and the King of Greenwood the Great have negotiated a bride token: King Thorin is willing to give King Thranduil the white gems of Eryn Lasgalen in exchange for his ward, Tauriel. Henceforth, the elf-maid will be under the protection of her dwarfish husband and his kin. Furthermore, both the King under the Mountain and the King of Greenwood the Great promise to support, protect and honour each other's realms._

_With their signatures, both parties will accept the terms of this betrothal.”_

_Balin handed the contract to King Thorin who quickly perused it before signing it. Then he handed the contract back to Balin. The old dwarf briefly checked the signature before handing the document to the elvenking who signed it as well without taking a second glance at it. Then it was Kíli's and Tauriel's turn. Kíli merely took a deep breath then he put his own name under his uncle's signature before passing the scroll on to Tauriel._

_The young elf couldn't prevent her hands from shaking while holding the paper and signing it as well. Then Balin took it back from her, presenting her with a soft smile._

“ _The contract has been signed by both parties, so Prince Kíli and Captain Tauriel are officially engaged now,” the white-haired dwarf declared._

_That was when Gandalf cleared his throat. “Oh, I think you forgot something important... Here, elves don't sign contracts when getting engaged; they exchange rings, although we will have to cut the official betrothal period shorter than usual due to circumstances” he declared, producing two silver rings from his gown._

_Thranduil rolled his eyes. “Ach, come on, Mithrandir! The deed's already done, there's no need for such trinkets. By defiling my Captain of the Guard, the dwarf already married her. Exchanging rings now is pointless!” the elvenking remarked._

_Tauriel noticed Kíli wincing after this comment and she felt bad for the young dwarf she had befriended back then in Mirkwood when he had been her prisoner._

“ _Thranduil! I'm disappointed in your attitude! Neither Tauriel nor Kíli had had a choice, the marriage had been an accident. And since Kíli's family seems to be making an effort at honouring traditions, you should too!” the wizard said with a booming voice and Tauriel noticed her king, no, her former king, to actually flinch._

_A dark part of her felt content._

_Then, with a kind expression, Mithrandir handed the silver rings to her and Kíli and encouraged them to exchange them while promising each other to get married according to all laws and customs..._

 

One week later, the silver rings had been replaced by golden ones at their wedding feast, after signing yet another contract. Tauriel smiled to herself while looking fondly at the wide golden band she wore on her right index finger. For the first time since Kíli had put it there, she felt content and proud of it and its meaning, not troubled by it.

“It's good to see you finally happy, my love,” Kíli whispered after the music had stopped and the royal couples were leaving the dancefloor, going back to the high table to make room for their wedding guests to engage in dancing and singing.

Tauriel looked down at her husband and her smile became even more radiant.

“I think I actually finally am,” she confessed, squeezing his hand.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm looking forward to your thoughts about the two new chapters...  
> Do you like the development of plot?  
> Please let me know what you think.


	15. Reminiscing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tauriel thinks back to her and Kíli's wedding...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Somehow my muse wants me to finish this as soon as possible.  
> Enjoy!

Around midnight, Fíli and Sigrid took their leave from the feast, saying goodnight to their close kin.

Although Sigrid smiled bravely, Tauriel could see the nervousness and fear in the girl's eyes because this would be her wedding night and she would fulfil her conjugal duty.

Earlier that evening Thorin had already given a speech in honour of his heir's wedding and thus the joining of Erebor and Dale, the union of a son of Durin and a daughter of man, explaining that this was the beginning of a new era and therefore they would break with old traditions, like the bedding ceremony or the presentation of the bedsheet and create their own, new traditions.

Those traditions included the exchange of vows and of rings by the newlyweds, cutting the wedding cake together and drinking mulled wine from the same cup after adding a drop of blood.

Immediately, Tauriel was reminded of her own wedding feast in the ruins of what once was the City of Dale...

 

_It was a cold and grey late autumn day on the cusp of winter and they hadn't seen the sun in weeks, not since before the battle. Tauriel was still residing in the ruins of Dale since she didn't know where else to go; she was no longer welcome among her own people yet still not really belonging to her fiancé's._

_Fiancé._

_Even in her wildest dreams Tauriel had never imagined to get married one day. Or to be a mother. Now she was both._

_The wedding ceremony was about to start very soon and she was already carrying a child; she could feel the first stirrings of the new life growing inside of her, torturing her broken fae with feelings of joy and hope._

_If she was honest, she would give it all back in the blink of an eye to rewrite an ending or two, to return to Mirkwood, to resume her position as Captain of the Guard, to be in Thranduil's favour again._

_Although her life had been boring and predictable before meeting Kíli, it had given her a sense of security, of stability, whereas now she wasn't sure what was in store for her._

_Marrying a dwarf, the king's nephew nonetheless!_

_However, she couldn't change her fate since both the ceremony and the feast were just a formality: By the law of her people she was already married to said dwarf, not because she had been too promiscuous but because the Valar had punished her for her hubris, for forgetting her place as a warrior and subject to her king._

_Now she had to pay the price._

_While Tauriel was getting dressed in the beautiful, petrol coloured robe consisting of a tight and low-cut bodice which had to be tied at the front and several layers of flared and swinging skirts Sigrid had found and rendered so that it would fit Tauriel's less curvy and more athletic figure, she heard a knock at the door._

“ _Yes please?” she asked._

“ _Tauriel? It's me, Sigrid. Can I come in?”_

_Tauriel smiled to herself. The young daughter of men had become a very good friend to the elf-maid during the last week, supporting her, helping her, consoling her, confiding in her. Yes, somehow Tauriel felt closer to that girl than to her husband(-to-be)._

“ _Of course you can. Actually, I might need your help with putting this impressive dress on,” she confessed._

_The hinges of the worm-eaten wooden door squeaked as Sigrid entered the room Tauriel had been given in the house Bard and his family had claimed as their own. As soon as Tauriel had been able to stand on her own two feet, despite her leg still being hurt, she had wanted to get away from the makeshift House of Healing, from this dreadful place in which she had been witness to so many deaths._

_Just the other day she had seen how a young woman (maybe only a little bit older than Sigrid) had lost her baby daughter. The woman's husband had been fighting against orcs and trolls while thinking that his wife and child had been safe. However, the orcs had found the woman in her hideout, tortured and raped her while her fourteen-months-old daughter had had to watch the despicable act; initially, the monsters had torn the little girl from her mother's arms and carelessly thrown her aside, but when the child had continued crying, they had shaken her until she hadn't made any sound at all (and one of the elven healers had explained to Tauriel that the child had been brain-damaged due to the shaking). Yet the saddest part had been that the woman couldn't even say goodbye to her daughter since she had been unconscious the whole time, so that the healers had made an exception for the woman's husband to sit with her and his dying child until it had all been over, after the child had taken her last breath in her father's arms who had been lying next to his unconscious wife._

_But maybe Tauriel shouldn't think about this today: Today was her wedding!_

“ _You look beautiful, Tauriel, although this is no real wedding dress,” Sigrid said as she was helping the elf-maid to fasten the laces on the dress's bodice._

“ _Thank you. But I think that you look more beautiful, Sigrid,” Tauriel replied and really meant it._

_Sigrid was wearing a dress similar in style to Tauriel's, yet her satin bodice was pin-striped in white and yellow and the skirts were made from yellow and white brocade. The girl's hair was arranged in a half-up bun and Tauriel spotted a very fine braid behind the girl's ear, fastened with a golden bead with a familiar pattern._

_Tauriel wasn't stupid; the braid was a dwarven courting braid and according to the pattern, the bead had been made by the heir of the house of Durin; a part of her was glad that at least Sigrid had been able to make a choice, to consciously decide on becoming involved with the dwarven king's oldest nephew, unlike Tauriel who had been forced to marry the spare._

“ _Don't say that, you make me feel uncomfortable,” Sigrid answered while skilfully tying Tauriel's bodice._

“ _But it's true, Sigrid!” Tauriel replied._

_Sigrid didn't say anything, just studying Tauriel's appearance for a moment._

“ _Are you really going to wear this?” she finally asked, pointing at Tauriel's silver pendant._

_The elf-maid lowered her gaze. “Yes, I think I will. It had been my mother's, you see...” she tried to explain but Sigrid just nodded._

“ _I understand. Yet I believe that some of the dwarves will not appreciate you wearing elvish jewellery... Didn't Kíli provide you with a traditional dwarvish choker at your betrothal?” she inquired._

_Tauriel bit her lower lip and shook her head, not wanting to know why Sigrid had better knowledge of dwarfish betrothal customs than her._

“ _No, he didn't... But don't blame him! Our engagement had been very rushed... And I haven't seen him since then...”_

_Somehow this fact made her more sad than the rest of the affair._

_Why hadn't Kíli visited her after their betrothal?_

_Maybe because he wasn't happy with it either, maybe she had been a passing fancy for him, yet thanks to Bolg and elvish marriage customs he was stuck with her, the inexperienced, snobbish and detached elven-maid...despite the fact that she wasn't a maid anymore._

_Sigrid smiled reassuringly at her._

“ _Don't worry, I won't blame him. Fíli told me that Kíli had been very busy with the wedding preparations, making sure that you will feel comfortable at Erebor,” she revealed._

_For some reason, Tauriel was relieved, though she didn't want to know when and why Sigrid had talked to Fíli._

_Then, Sigrid's expression became serious._

“ _Tauriel, King Thranduil delivered something to us today... It's for you, a bridal bouquet, made from holly and evergreens and tied together with a ribbon of wild silk, the same colour as your wedding dress...” the girl confessed._

_For some reason, the elvenking's gesture touched her, though she was convinced he just wanted to make sure that she would be a worthy representative of her people and especially as his ward._

“ _That's wonderful,Sigrid, it really is. I will gladly wear it!” she reassured the girl._

_Sigrid nodded._

“ _All right. I will help you to style your hair and place the flower crown upon your head... I don't know if you have considered it, but your and Kíli's wedding is the first official and happy occasion taking place in this city after its reclamation... It means so much to my people,” the girl said and Tauriel didn't want to remind her that the reason for the wedding wasn't really a happy cause since neither her nor Kíli had had a say in this..._

 

“Don't worry, Sigrid, you will be fine,” Tauriel whispered into her sister-in-law's ear, when the two of them embraced while Fíli and Kíli were doing exactly the same. Honestly, the newlyweds wouldn't leave the mountain, yet everyone was acting as if they would be travelling across Middle Earth, not returning home for a long time.

Maybe the wedding night held a special meaning for dwarves, something metaphorical, like a spiritual journey, moving to the next level of adulthood; Tauriel didn't know.

“Thank you, Tauriel, for everything. You're my best friend, no matter what will happen in the future,” Sigrid said before she allowed her husband to lead her away from the feast and towards their chambers.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, your comments are very much appreciated.  
> Oh, and the phrase "give it all back [...] to rewrite an ending or two" I have borrowed from Sarah Baralleis's song "She used to be mine".


	16. Thoughts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tauriel remembers her wedding ceremony...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope the flashbacks don't bother you.

The wedding celebrations lasted well into the early hours of the next morning, transitioning into an early breakfast, as it was usual for dwarven weddings, yet not all wedding guests stayed that long. Most of them left the feast shortly after the newlyweds had retired to their rooms, among them King Bard, his family and the representatives of mankind who had participated in the royal wedding.

Tauriel studied the scene in front of her; most dwarves were already drunk, the males sitting together in clusters, laughing, play fighting, singing, the females strewn about the room in pairs, whispering and giggling and gossiping. From time to time, some of the dwarrowdams looked into her direction, before turning again towards their friends.

Apparently, she was once again the centre of attention.

“Do you want to retire to your rooms?” Kíli asked her suddenly.

Tauriel bit her lower lip, then nodded. The pregnancy was exhausting her body in ways she had never known before.

So Kíli stood up and extending his hand, he helped her to her feet, like he had done before they had joined the dance with Fíli and Sigrid, Dís and Dwalin, Thorin and Bilbo.

“Let's just say goodnight to those who matter,” Kíli remarked, slightly squeezing her hand.

Tauriel frowned. “Oh, you don't have to go if you don't want to... You can stay and celebrate, it's your brother's wedding after all,” she relented, not wanting to be a burden for her husband.

Kíli just shook his head. “No, I'll escort you to your rooms and afterwards I'll go straight to bed... I think I have drunk one ale too many,” he confessed.

Tauriel nodded.

That was true; Kíli had drunk with his brother, with his mother, with his uncle, with Bilbo, with his father, with Nori, with Bofur. Tauriel thought she knew why; he was a little bit sad that his dearly loved brother was married now, meaning that his wife and his future children would be his top priority from now on. At least officially.

Tauriel highly doubted that; she was convinced that nothing and nobody could come between the brothers. Yet she was okay with it. To see Kíli happy made her happy and sometimes she was sure that Fíli made her husband happier than she would ever be able to... For now, at least. Soon, it would not only be her and Kíli but also their daughter and Tauriel knew that the little girl's existence made Kíli already very happy.

Maybe she should have told him earlier that she was expecting, maybe already at their wedding feast...

 

_The bridegroom and the guests of the unusual wedding between a dwarf and an elf were already assembled in the parlour of King Bard's new home when the bride entered the room._

_It was a small gathering: Of course, t_ _he dwarves from Thorin's company attended the feast (not wanting to miss how their 'little prince tied the knot', as they put it), then there were Bilbo (as Thorin's guest of honour) and Gandalf (who would conduct the ceremony together with Balin), then the elven king and his son, accompanied by Tauriel's three dearest companions among Thranduil's guard as well as Bard and his children._

_Mithrandír stood at the other end of the room in his customary grey attire, smiling kindly at her when she entered the room together with Sigrid, clutching her bridal bouquet (which matched her flower-crown – a symbol for virginity, so she thought that her wearing it now was kind of ironic – and her wedding dress),returning Gandalf's smile._

_Tauriel didn't know whose cheeks showed a deeper shade of red, hers or Sigrid's when everyone's attention was drawn to them._

_Kíli, standing in front of the wizard together with his brother and uncle, smiled shyly at her while she was walking towards her betrothed and Gandalf, her knees shaking, before joining Thranduil and Legolas who represented her family during the ceremony._

_So, she took her place between her former king and his son, avoiding to look at them, knowing that Thranduil was not pleased with the whole affair, that he would have never condoned her, his ward, his Captain of the Guard, marrying a dwarf,Thorin Oakenshield's newphew nonetheless, yet fate didn't leave him a choice._

_While listening to Gandalf with only half an ear, Tauriel stole a few glances at her husband and his kin._

_Kíli really looked handsome in his formal attire, consisting of dark grey britches, a white tunic and a royal blue jerkin, his hair arranged in his customary half-up, yet sporting the crooked betrothal braids she had put in his hair at their betrothal ceremony a week ago.Of course, she knew how to do her own hair (and when they had been younger, she had also braided Legolas's from time to time), yet dwarven hair had a different structure than elven hair (although Kíli had claimed that his hair was softer than that of the average dwarf – though why that was the case only Mahal knew)._

" _Tauriel?“ Kíli suddenly asked her carefully, alomost shyly, while everyone else was staring at her with expectant expressions._

" _I'm sorry, I got a little bit distracted,“ she confessed, blushing again, looking at her own kin as well as Kíli's apologetically._

_Thranduil snorted, Thorin rolled his eyes, Legolas frowned and Fíli whispered something into his brother's ear._

_Tauriel lowered her gaze. She hated the way she was acting since the events on Ravenhill in general and especially since her betrothal to a Prince of Erebor. Although she was still very young for an elf, she already was a proud warrior, not some immature little elfling!_

" _Don't worry, lass, this is an exciting day for you and I'm afraid that listening to all the formalities can be a bit exhausting, yet it is important that you answer my question consciously knowing what it entails: Do you, Tauriel, King Thranduil's ward, Captain of the elvenking's Guard in Mirkwood, formerly known as Greenwood the Great, agree to marry this dwarf, Prince Kíli, son of the Lady Dís, nephew to the King under the Mountain, Thorin Oakenshield, of your own free will?“_

_Tauriel took a deep breath._

" _Yes, I agree,“ she answered quietly, looking only at Balin._

_The white-haired dwarf smiled fondly at her._

" _Good. And do you, Prince Kíli, son of the Lady Dís, nephew of the King under the Mountain, Thorin Oakenshield, agree to marry this elf-maid, Tauriel, King Thranduil's ward, Captain of the elvenking's Guard in Mirkwood, formerly known as Greenwood the Great, of your own free will?“_

_Kíli nodded enthusiastically while firmly saying, "I do!“_

" _Good. That is settled then,“ Balin said, looking at Gandalf._

_The wizard smiled at bride and bridegroom, before slightly nodding at Kíli._

_The young dwarf swallowed before taking something out of his pocket. "Tauriel? Gandalf and Balin told me about elven marriage customs... I know that our silver betrothal rings have to be replaced by golden wedding bands, so I spent most of last week to craft them for us...“ Saying that, he opened the plain wooden box and presented her with a matching pair of wide, wrought golden rings._

_Tauriel bit her lower lip, touched by her husband's efforts._

" _Oh, Kíli, they are beautiful,“ she remarked and the dwarf smiled genuinely at her, before taking the silver band off her finger and replacing it with the golden one._

_Afterwards she did the same whereas the silver rings were placed inside the box for safekeeping. "I will store them in Uncle's treasury,“ Kíli revealed and Tauriel couldn't help but smile at him._

_Gandalf and Balin exchanged a meaningful glance before the wizard announced, "I declare you husband and wife! You may kiss the bride now!“_

_Tauriel felt her stomach drop. She and Kíli had never kissed before, yet she knew that this was important to validate their marriage in front of Kíli's kin before signing the marriage contract._

_Thus, when Kíli looked at her expectantly, she slightly nodded and bowed down so that he could briefly press his lips against hers; that was all and definitely not what she had expected from a kiss._

" _All right, I guess it's time to sign the marriage contract and then to share mead and meat!“ Balin remarked, handing over a scroll to Kíli, who signed it without hesitation before giving it back to the older dwarf._

_Balin just nodded, then he gave the contract to Tauriel. "Your turn, lass,“ he said softly and Tauriel put her signature next to her husband's before handing the scroll back to the white-haired dwarf._

_Afterwards it was Thorin's and Thranduil's turn to sign the contract..._

 

"Goodnight, Tauriel,“ Kíli said when they stopped in front of her rooms, raising on his tiptoes so that he could place a light kiss on her cheek.

Tauriel returned the gesture. "Goodnight, Kíli!“

Then he slightly bowed to her before turning towards his own rooms, leaving her all alone in the semi-dark corridor.

With a shaking hand she unlocked her door, stepping inside her bedchamber, wondering whether she should have invited Kíli to spend the night.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I always appreciate what you have to say about this story!

**Author's Note:**

> This is just what popped into my mind.  
> 


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